Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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