i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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