Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
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