how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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