Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
