i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Randomize
