do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
