We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
