is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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