Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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