brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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