he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
