oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
