just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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