You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize