your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
