you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
