4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
