And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I supernannyed him into submission
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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