do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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