It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
