After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
