He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
