Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
