did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
