I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
