its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Randomize