Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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