trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
