somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
