Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.

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(719): View more from Colorado

tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.

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(678): View more from Georgia

Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.

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(317): View more from Indiana

A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.

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(812): View more from Indiana

She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.

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(520): View more from Arizona

I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!

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(559): View more from California

I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.

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(404): View more from Georgia

He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.

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