is your mom at the bar?
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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