I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
that's an acceptable place to lick
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
