I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
She's the barista slut.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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