yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
