they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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