If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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