I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
