when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
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