So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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