So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
