So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
