oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
