The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize