I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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