How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
