I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Randomize
