Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
