Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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