My sheets look like a crime scene.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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