Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize